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Sunday, February 15, 2009
Just one of my many hang-ups
I can't figure out how to address God. Everytime I pray I go through this little process of what to call him. Is it "Dear God" or just "God" or "Jesus" or maybe "Father God." I have no idea. Then after I decide how to address Him it never fails that during the prayer I can't figure out what to call Him. I always begin with the sign of the Cross because I'm a fallen Catholic and it just feels incomplete unless I start and end by crossing myself. But, that doesn't help with how to address Him. See, when I talk to God I actually treat it like a conversation. I talk to Him just like I talk to many of you. But, sometimes I call Him God and sometimes I call Him Jesus and of course sometimes I call Him Dude (what? It's a capital "D".) This probably doesn't seem like a huge problem for most of you but it is for me because I feel like in order to get closer to Him and cultivate my relationship with Him I have to understand who I'm talking to. I don't know. I sort of think of God as the father and Jesus as a really good friend. But, are they the same? Jesus is a person though and I don't think of God as a person so much as a presence. Who am I really talking to? I guess this all goes back to the Trinity which I have NEVER been able to fully understand. I'm ok with that because a very wise person once asked me "would you really want a God you can fully understand?" No I would not. But, I need to understand who I'm actually talking to when I pray. And, at this point I have absolutely no idea. But, whoever it is must be listening because my prayers are being answered! Obviously I would really like to hear your comments about this one. Please help me!!
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2 comments:
You should have heard the talk at our Pastorate about all the different names for God and how we use different names in different instances. Like, for example, when Mom is fuming mad at you, she yells "Sarah Rae!" rather than using her nickname for you which is reserved for your angelic moments, "Hoochigoo." Same is true with God. Don't you use different names for the same people, depending on your mood, the subject matter of your discussion, the amount of respect being shown, etc? You need to ask Mandy Steed about it. She gave the talk. I never knew there were so many names for God and that we can address him differently according to specific situations. Another example, when you are addressing mom casually - "Mom." When you are disgusted with mom - "MOTHER!" When you are a child - "Mommy." When you are a baby - "Mama."
Anyhoo, that being said, God probably doesn't care as much about how you address him as he does the fact that you are addressing him. He just wants to hear from you. Period.
Sarah, I miss your questions, so I'm glad you're blogging them. It's perfectly confusing isn't it? The cool thing is that you said "I have to understand who I'm talking to". It's cool because you know that God is not an "it" or simply a "force", but a "who". Would you rather pray to a God you think of as a person? If so, stick with Jesus. Would that make prayer seem more real to you? Just before his death, Jesus began addressing his followers as "friends". He is your BFF, so pray to Jesus if it helps. Invite him into your living space just like you mentioned in another blog entry. Think of Jesus as being right next to you, because he is.
Although God never wants us to lose the sense of awe and wonder when we're in his presence, he also invites us into an intimate friendship. He wants us to think of him as our closest, dearest and nearest friend. So try going with Jesus for a while to see if it works.
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